How to Know If You Are in a Toxic Relationship - And What to Do About It

How can you tell if you are in a toxic relationship? These examples will give you an idea:

• Your boyfriend/girlfriend is not shy about cutting you down in front of other people.
• Their words don't match their deeds. They say they love you, but their actions say something entirely different.
• Your partner is trying to control you, always snooping into your private business and checking up on what you're doing.
• He/she wants you to depend on them for your needs.
• You are so hung up about pleasing them that you've sacrificed your core values to do so.

Toxic people make you sick just to be around. This begs the question; why would anyone allow themselves to end up in a toxic relationship?

Toxic relationships are cyclical in nature. There's the honeymoon period, then the toxic person blows up, then he/she reconciles and promises to change-beginning the cycle again.

So, how can you tell if you are in a toxic relationship? Many times, you wont even know until the relationship has gone on for a while.

People are often sucked in by the initial honeymoon period, then after a while they realize that this person is not who he/she claimed to be-at which point it is harder to get out of it.

A big reason that many people end up in these kinds of relationships is that this is what they are comfortable with. They may have grown up in a household where toxic relationships were present, and are repeating the same patterns without even realizing it.

After you realize that you are in a toxic relationship, the first step is to DECIDE that you will not live like this anymore. Stand up for yourself! Let your partner know that they are not going to manipulate you any longer.

You may find this difficult at first, because in most toxic relationships, the toxic partner has convinced you that everything that goes wrong is your fault. This could make it hard to walk away or reset the parameters of the relationship.If you need outside help at this point, you may want to seek the support of your local church or a therapy group.

The good news is that some people are able to break the cycles of toxic relationships. Some of them leave the relationship and form new, healthier bonds, while others are able to remain in their current relationship and make it into a healthy one.

Once you have decided that you are willing to walk out the door if your partner refuses to change, this should provide motivation to your partner to make serious changes. You need to clearly convey the message that you are no longer dependent on this toxic relationship and that he/she MUST change if the relationship is going to continue.

After your partner realizes that you are serious about change, you can then begin to set up new parameters for the relationship. Let your partner know what you need from them, and be responsive to their needs as well. If you do not get what you need, your partner will know that you are prepared to leave.

This should provide some answers to the question "how can you tell if you are in a toxic relationship?" Remember that, if you are in a toxic relationship, you must make the decision to change it-either by walking away or healing your current relationship.